I am the Pop Quiz Secret Keeper!

Do you see the above video? Is the collaboration of thousands of colored pixels making it's way safely to your eyeholes, and onward into your brain?

This is called 'Pop Quiz'. It is popcorn. But is it just popcorn? Dammit, it's so much more than just popcorn.

Pop Quiz played on our 1990's American love of things that were colorful. The 1980's love of the rainbow and bright colors drifted blissfully into the 1990's where we came up with even more things to put colors on (as human beings are want to do). One of these things that was randomly hit by the "If it's colorful, you can sell it" fad happened to be popcorn.

Pop Quiz came in a box like all other popcorn, it popped in the special microwave bag like all the popcorn, and in the end, it was buttery and delicious. Hooray for Pop Quiz! 

When my parents made my brother and I Pop Quiz for the first time, I was just excited to be eating popcorn. Popcorn was salty and disolvey, and the yellow pieces got stuck in your teeth (and removing them was an adventure for your tongue to go on), and your hands got all shiny. I loved popcorn, and was honored to be part of the popping corn experience.

This time when my parents gave me popcorn, however, everything changed. Life would never be the same again.

The popcorn was red. Highly unusual for popcorn to be red isn't it? But there it was. Sitting in the big bowl in front of the TV, a playful red color. I approached my father to find out just what the devil was going on here, and he informed me, "Son (he didn't say that), this before you is Pop Quiz (He doesn't talk this way). When you pop a bag of Pop Quiz, it comes out a color. You never know what color it will be!"

It was at this exact moment that my brain completely shut down and accepted the colorful popcorn as my new GOD. Every time you popped it, you didn't know what was going to happen! It could be BLUE! It could turn out GREEN! And it could be yellow too… Yellow, because sometimes I need a break from my popcorn being exciting colors (Yellow was fucking dumb, and I hope all the other popcorn bags treated the yellow ones like SHIT).

I always made another bag if I got yellow.

Suspense is the best popcorn seasoning. That and rainbow colors. That is why popcorn will never ever be good enough for me again. Because you can't recreate the flavor of not knowing where on the color wheel your popcorn will land when it's done in 3 minutes time. I believe this popcorn made me the man I am today…

So why does no one seem to remember it!? I have asked nearly everyone I've come in contact with lately, and they all look at me as if to say, "There goes dear Andrew (they don't talk like this), touched in the head as a lad, he was. Poor dear talks about when popcorn was colors." and I don't get it! How can I be the only one? 

I cannot be the only young man who had the pleasure on enjoying randomly colored popcorn as a lad.  That's not a world I want to be a part of. You people are ruining my life.

How can you live with yourselves knowing that there's a green popcorn out there that your planet Earth has completely DENIED you?! Your own species, mankind, left you to rot in a cultural WASTELAND where blue popping corn is a thing to be feared and shunned! Your GOD deemed you unworthy to behold his greatest creation. Your god hath forsaken you.

Everyone needs to look back and think hard, and I'm sure you'll remember. You may have blacked out from how amazing the experience was, but I believe in you, and I believe you can find those memories, like remembering the lyrics to a song you loved a decade prior. I need to know if there are others. 

I can't be alone.

Don't leave me alone in this darkness.